Inexcusable by Chris Lynch

Keir Sarafian is a good guy. At least that's what he believes of himself. But as the reader follows his first person narration leading up to a life altering event, it becomes clear that everything is not as he would like it to seem. He describes over and over again the things he finds 'inexcusable', but can never see that what he does is the most inexcusable thing of all.

Reading this YA book was like putting on a pair of drunk goggles and then trying to ride a unicycle in a straight line. Not to say it was badly written or that I couldn't get through the book. Quite the contrary I finished it in a day or two, partly due to shortness. However, reading this story through the delusional and under the influence haze that the main character lives in is exceedingly difficult. I felt like I was trying to get a handle on characters and plot with a layer of thick fog over my eyes and three layers of cotton balls in my ears. I kept getting a headache from reading it simply because of how purposely thick this person was. By the end of this book I felt like I'd glimpsed into the mind of a psychopath. For someone to really not understand that they have done a truly heinous thing was pretty disturbing and sickening. On the other hand it was also kind of eye opening in seeing how warped society can be in excusing people for their wrongdoings and letting them go on believing that what they do is okay.

I think the topic was relevant and carries a good cautionary message. However I didn't really like the book itself. Keir drove me up the wall, the choppy back and forth between flashback and present action was disorienting and distracting, the ending was kind of anti-climatic, and to be honest I have never been a fan of stream of consciousness narration, which this pretty much is. As a novel it has a decent amount of acclaim and authors I really like have recommended it, but I can't really say the same. I was hoping this would be a really great novel that I could get into but I'm left feeling disappointed and unsettled.